Perseverance

Having received the telephone call that my niece had been injured in a serious automobile accident, the shock of the news hit very hard and questions swirled in my head.  What happened?  How bad?  Will she recover?  Is her pain contolled?  Thoughts came rushing in of a little girl newly arrived in this country and of days spent watching her with her new mommy and daddy.  The words "ice' catte" came to my mind.  "Ice cream" from the mouth of the tiny Korean child were words we heard over and over as we spent days together sight-seeing in southern California.  Then tears came to my eyes as I thought of her mommy and daddy right now and how their hearts must be breaking.  I thought of a beautiful,  lively, sweet, smart, wonderful young woman just starting out in life...and the tears wouldn't stop. 

As the days passed, between talking things over with the Lord and hearing updates of Julee's condition, I began to ask myself how I could help my niece. Four hours of driving would bring me to her bedside, but what then? I realized that perhaps the best gift I could give might be some words of wisdom learned through years of surgeries and hospitalizations. Maybe my experiences could give hope and expertise which only I could give. So Julee, here goes...

As trite as it may sound, remember that "this too shall pass."  No matter how intense the current situation is, it will change and improve over time.

While in the hospital, do not hesitate to ask for anything you may need including, but not limited to: medication for pain, help in doing things, having each and every question answered, etc.

Also be sure to follow all medical advice.  There is a reason for everything.  Trust the doctors and do what they say.

It is okay to be sad and angry.  If these emotions hit, then welcome them and don't be afraid of them.  Once acknowledged, let them go as you are able.  God understands all of our feelings.  He designed us to be emotional, feeling people.

On the other hand, look for joy every day.  You may find it where you least expect it.

Allow people to minister to you.  It is a gift to let people help you.  Everyone wants to know what they can do.  It is not a burden for them to be there for you--rather a joy that helps them too.

Pain will be your companion for a while.  It is actually there to help you know how to set limits.  It is also there to make you strong.  Listen to it, but also use whatever methods you can to overcome it including medication, relaxation techniques, distractions and always, always prayer.

As you may hear over and over, "take one day at a time."  It may be overused advice, but it is definately true that sometimes, moment by moment, is the only way to keep going.

If you ever start to worry about your future, remember that none of us in any situation knows the future.  Worry is fruitless.  God will be with us whatever we have to face, so try to rest in that.  I know it is easier said than done, but try--and I will too.

Accept what your body is telling you.  If it tells you to rest, then rest.  If it tells you to eat....well, you get the picture.

Find things to laugh about.  No doubt your family and friends will be there to help you with that.  It is good too, to laugh about the things that don't go just right because, as I have learned repeatedly, it is one of the best tools to see you through.

Try not to ask "WHY?" in the philisophical sense that is.  There really is no answer as to why things happen the way they do.  This is one I have learned over many years and many times of asking why.  Now, I just don't allow myself to go there.

Keep on keepin' on.  Perhaps another overused phrase, but sound advice nonetheless.  Don't give up, even on the days you might want to.

My mantra for many years has focused on acceptance.  "It is what it is" applies to many things in life.  For me, I try to accept what is and trust that God will see me through.  I have found that it is just too easy for bitterness to grow otherwise.

And finally, even though it may be difficult to realize at this moment, understand that all you are going through is making you into the person God wants you to be.  Your experiences will open doors of understanding and empathy that you may never have cultivated in any other way.

Keep living and loving and trying and hoping....and know that your Aunt Linda loves you....along with so many, many others who are hoping and praying for your speedy and complete recovery.

Keep building.  I know you will make beautiful things.